I was having lunch with a friend earlier today and we were discussing out Halloween costumes. At one point in the conversation, he looks at me and says, “I just hope I’m not going overboard.”
My first reaction was to be horrified. Halloween is the perfect time to go overboard and let loose. Wear a wig, create a new persona, be who you want to be. That’s why Halloween is my favorite holiday (that and the fact that Halloween is indeed my birthday. I’ll be 21 and, yes, I will be accepting birthday wishes all week!) But then I decided that there are provisions to the whole concept of letting loose, especially for us Big Girls. A friend of a friend decided she was going as a “slut” for Halloween. Her costume consisted of a bustier, thong, and fishnets. I kindly asked her where she was going to store her fat for the night. Harsh, true, but she ultimately decided not to wear the “costume” and picked something different.
So, here’s a guideline for Halloween costumes.
1) Some things are ok to wear on Halloween. Take this as an example: I hate shiny leggings. Hate them. But for Halloween, I’ll wear them because nothing says Rocky Horror “Sweet Transvestite” quite like shiny leggings. Not matching is totally acceptable on Halloween, too.
2) But don’t think that Halloween gives you a free pass to let it all hang out. Because while it may be something you don’t wear everyday, giving your friends/coworkers an eyeful of what you have going on underneath your clothes is not something you can magically erase.
3) Just because Lady GaGa wore it, doesn’t mean you should. Please refrain from covering yourself with slabs of meat.
4) Ironic costumes are a no-no. I never really understood the point of a big girl/guy wearing a cow/sumo/fat ballerina costume. Story time: I was at work the other day and we do, unfortunately, have the fat ballerina costume. If you’ve never seen this costume atrocity, let me describe it for you: it’s made out of this plasticy material. Flesh colored arms and legs, pink leotard, gold tutu. You fill it up with air. Get the picture? Ok, back to the story. This girl (big but not fabulous) comes in with all her little skinny friends and she BUYS THIS COSTUME. Guess what? It’s sad, not ironic, if you don’t need the air pump to fill out the costume.
5) Wear make-up. And lots of it. If you’re one of the ones who never wears make-up, then Halloween should be your time to do so. I love it. Pink/red/lime green eyeshadow and lots of it. Bright red/black/purple/grey lipstick and lots of it. Fake tattoos and fake eyelashes. Wigs! Wear a wig! All of it’s good and fun and you should enjoy it!
So, whether you decide to be a monster or a witch or a punk rocker, make sure that you’re having fun with it, that you look rad as can be and that above all you won’t be embarrassed when people post pictures of you on face book.
Happy Haunting, my dears.
And, as always, “I’m beautiful, I’m beautiful, I’M BEAUTIFUL, DAMN IT!”
Xoxox
Anda
Questions? Comments? Birthday wishes? ;)
Prtali@yahoo.com
Tuesday, October 26, 2010
Thursday, October 14, 2010
We LOVE To Shop!
It's true. Big Girls love to shop just as much as anyone else.
This is a list of all the places that Anda and I love to shop at.
1. I absolutely adore Lane Bryant. I go there for jeans, leggins, shirts, bras, panties and everything else in between. Plus they carry Seven apparel, and they recently started carrying DKNY.
http://www.lanebryant.com/
2. Avenue. You can usually find something good in this store. Anda likes their skinny jeans, leggins, and panties. Plus they have amazing sales!
http://www.avenue,com/
3. Torrid. They have some really really cute clothes here. It is more geared to the younger generations, and isn't so big on career wear.
http://www.torrid.com/
4. Old Navy. I love Old Navy. They go up to a XXL in stores, but they have sizes 16-30 online, and they offer free shipping. They have some really cute stuff, and it's affordable!
http://www.oldnavy.com/
5. Target. Anda and I both love love love Target. They have a pretty good selection of plus size clothes to choose from. Just be careful when you go in and look, because even though they have some good stuff, they also have some very bad stuff, that no one should be wearing. They also have awesome bags and scarves. Great for accessory shopping!
http://www.target.com/
6. I love Burlington Coat Factory too. You have to look to find something perfect, but when you find it it is pure bliss!
7. Ross. Anda loves Ross for bags. They have awesome deals on bags, and really cute ones too.
8. Hot Topic. If you like music and you want everyone else to know it, go pick up some band shirts from here. They also have really awesome accessories, and bags too.
http://www.hottopic.com/
9. Walgreens/Local drug store. You can pick up all of your everyday needs from these stores. Its convenient and easier than going to a huge store to pick up everyday essentials.
10. Ulta. I love make up stores. Plain and simple. I would live in Ulta if I could. They have every kind of make up that you could imagine, plus fragrances, and a hair salon. And they have an awesome rewards program!
http://www.ulta.com/
As professional Big Girls, we have figured out what places have the best fashions for us. When you shop at these places they don't disappoint! We love them, and we hope that you will too!
xox- Pauline
Need help? Have suggestions? Write us!
prtali@yahoo.com We'd love to hea from you!
This is a list of all the places that Anda and I love to shop at.
1. I absolutely adore Lane Bryant. I go there for jeans, leggins, shirts, bras, panties and everything else in between. Plus they carry Seven apparel, and they recently started carrying DKNY.
http://www.lanebryant.com/
2. Avenue. You can usually find something good in this store. Anda likes their skinny jeans, leggins, and panties. Plus they have amazing sales!
http://www.avenue,com/
3. Torrid. They have some really really cute clothes here. It is more geared to the younger generations, and isn't so big on career wear.
http://www.torrid.com/
4. Old Navy. I love Old Navy. They go up to a XXL in stores, but they have sizes 16-30 online, and they offer free shipping. They have some really cute stuff, and it's affordable!
http://www.oldnavy.com/
5. Target. Anda and I both love love love Target. They have a pretty good selection of plus size clothes to choose from. Just be careful when you go in and look, because even though they have some good stuff, they also have some very bad stuff, that no one should be wearing. They also have awesome bags and scarves. Great for accessory shopping!
http://www.target.com/
6. I love Burlington Coat Factory too. You have to look to find something perfect, but when you find it it is pure bliss!
7. Ross. Anda loves Ross for bags. They have awesome deals on bags, and really cute ones too.
8. Hot Topic. If you like music and you want everyone else to know it, go pick up some band shirts from here. They also have really awesome accessories, and bags too.
http://www.hottopic.com/
9. Walgreens/Local drug store. You can pick up all of your everyday needs from these stores. Its convenient and easier than going to a huge store to pick up everyday essentials.
10. Ulta. I love make up stores. Plain and simple. I would live in Ulta if I could. They have every kind of make up that you could imagine, plus fragrances, and a hair salon. And they have an awesome rewards program!
http://www.ulta.com/
As professional Big Girls, we have figured out what places have the best fashions for us. When you shop at these places they don't disappoint! We love them, and we hope that you will too!
xox- Pauline
Need help? Have suggestions? Write us!
prtali@yahoo.com We'd love to hea from you!
Tuesday, October 12, 2010
Own Your Style
The purpose of our entire blog is to guide. While I hope that you follow our guide, I also hope that you own your own style. Not everything that we write about (fashion-wise) will work for you or you just may not feel comfortable wearing it (I have a friend who refuses to wear leggings).
Take this as an example: I’ve always thought that certain shades of navy (yes… there are different shades!) and black work well together. Most people will tell you that they clash, though, so I’ve always avoided wearing the two together. Until last week. Last week, I picked up an older edition of O Magazine, and Oprah’s Creative Director Adam told me that he thought thinking navy and black went together meant I had a real sense of style. Ok, he wasn’t talking to me directly, but those were his words. I still shudder at the thought of black and brown together, but now I feel free to wear my cute navy top with some cute black leggings. (I would like to say that I think black on top and navy on bottom looks awkward.)
Speaking of leggings, my dears, I think we should set a few ground rules. Especially since it’s fall (YAY!) and fall is definitely my favorite time of year to wear leggings.
1) Just say no to… spandex. Your leggings should NOT be made of spandex. Try suede or denim or cloth or nylon, anything but spandex.
2) No thick leggings. Hello! Leggings give shape. Why would you want to wear thick leggings that add bulk?
3) Do not treat your leggings as pants because they are not pants.
4) Longer tops work with leggings. Longer tops cover your butt, hips, and tummy.
5) Proper footwear. Flats, low heels, boots, and yes, even a pair of converse (I’m going to be that punk rock kid until I die) work well with leggings. Know what doesn’t? High heels. Can we say trailer trash? Thought so. Olivia Newton John is the only person who could ever pull this look off.
Now, I have to tell you about my MUST HAVE item for October. SCARVES! I love scarves. Why? Let me count the reasons. They pull an outfit together, they keep your neck warm, they add color to a dreary outfit, they cover hickeys, double chins, and anything else you might want to camouflage.
Pauline’s MUST HAVE item for October is the ever warm and comfortable and stylish fleece jacket!
What about those days that aren’t so cold? Try a nice light sweater. This past spring Avenue was having a HUGE sale on winter apparel. I’m not usually one to buy three seasons in advance, but I saw this completely cute sweater (think long, light beige, very versatile) with an even cuter price ($11 marked down from $45!). The best part? I can wear my tank tops underneath because I’m not quite ready to give them up just yet.
Another fall favorite? A blazer. Not your father’s blazer, mind you, but a woman’s fitted blazer.
I love hoodies as well, just make sure it’s the right kind of hoodie. Don’t go for the thick, boyish looking ones. I’m a fan of the t-shirt material hoodies because they’re light, come in a great array of colors and add little to no bulk.
So, here’s your guide.
Mix it up. (My blazer has My Chemical Romance patches on it.)
Own your style.
Remember, “I’m beautiful, I’m beautiful, I’M BEAUTIFUL, DAMN IT!”
Xoxox,
Anda
Questions? Comments? We’d love to hear from you!
Prtali@yahoo.com
Take this as an example: I’ve always thought that certain shades of navy (yes… there are different shades!) and black work well together. Most people will tell you that they clash, though, so I’ve always avoided wearing the two together. Until last week. Last week, I picked up an older edition of O Magazine, and Oprah’s Creative Director Adam told me that he thought thinking navy and black went together meant I had a real sense of style. Ok, he wasn’t talking to me directly, but those were his words. I still shudder at the thought of black and brown together, but now I feel free to wear my cute navy top with some cute black leggings. (I would like to say that I think black on top and navy on bottom looks awkward.)
Speaking of leggings, my dears, I think we should set a few ground rules. Especially since it’s fall (YAY!) and fall is definitely my favorite time of year to wear leggings.
1) Just say no to… spandex. Your leggings should NOT be made of spandex. Try suede or denim or cloth or nylon, anything but spandex.
2) No thick leggings. Hello! Leggings give shape. Why would you want to wear thick leggings that add bulk?
3) Do not treat your leggings as pants because they are not pants.
4) Longer tops work with leggings. Longer tops cover your butt, hips, and tummy.
5) Proper footwear. Flats, low heels, boots, and yes, even a pair of converse (I’m going to be that punk rock kid until I die) work well with leggings. Know what doesn’t? High heels. Can we say trailer trash? Thought so. Olivia Newton John is the only person who could ever pull this look off.
Now, I have to tell you about my MUST HAVE item for October. SCARVES! I love scarves. Why? Let me count the reasons. They pull an outfit together, they keep your neck warm, they add color to a dreary outfit, they cover hickeys, double chins, and anything else you might want to camouflage.
Pauline’s MUST HAVE item for October is the ever warm and comfortable and stylish fleece jacket!
What about those days that aren’t so cold? Try a nice light sweater. This past spring Avenue was having a HUGE sale on winter apparel. I’m not usually one to buy three seasons in advance, but I saw this completely cute sweater (think long, light beige, very versatile) with an even cuter price ($11 marked down from $45!). The best part? I can wear my tank tops underneath because I’m not quite ready to give them up just yet.
Another fall favorite? A blazer. Not your father’s blazer, mind you, but a woman’s fitted blazer.
I love hoodies as well, just make sure it’s the right kind of hoodie. Don’t go for the thick, boyish looking ones. I’m a fan of the t-shirt material hoodies because they’re light, come in a great array of colors and add little to no bulk.
So, here’s your guide.
Mix it up. (My blazer has My Chemical Romance patches on it.)
Own your style.
Remember, “I’m beautiful, I’m beautiful, I’M BEAUTIFUL, DAMN IT!”
Xoxox,
Anda
Questions? Comments? We’d love to hear from you!
Prtali@yahoo.com
Thursday, October 7, 2010
Must Have IT!
Must Have IT!
If you’re anything like me, you have a problem with impulse buying. I know I do, especially when it comes to new skin/hair/nail/makeup products. My bathroom cabinets (and a few storage bins in my room) are full of products I bought on impulse, used a couple times, deemed them crap, and put in a box for “later inspection”. Sound familiar? I’ve compiled a list of things that I firmly believe you must-have (and Pauline made one, too!) I’m not saying that you should never buy any other items because there is always room to try new things, but these should always be in your cabinet and should always be your backup plan when the new items turn out to be complete garbage.
Anda’s List of Must-Haves
Skin Care
1) Anything from Neutrogena. Seriously. I’m a huge fan of their “rapid action” products. I’ve used all sorts of products and none of them ever worked for me until I started using Neutrogena. (on a side note, if your face is naturally oily… you don’t need a moisturizer!)
2) Everyone needs, AT A MINIMUM, two different kinds of lotion. One that locks in moisture after a shower and at night before you go to bed, and one that smells nice for during the day use. Since I’m a tattoo freak, I’m a huge fan Aveeno. It’s fragrance free, so it is especially good if you have sensitive skin. For the other lotion, try something from Bath and Body Works (I really love their summer collection of coconut based lotions). Don’t want to spend a lot? Suave has just come out with a line of lotions comparable to the Bath and Body Works line.
3) Bikini Zone shave gel. Use it EVERYWHERE you shave. Underarms, legs, wherever, wherever. Soaps dry out your skin when you’re shaving. Bikini Zone contains no soap and it aloe based. Result? Smoother, less irritated legs.
4) Bio Oil. It works on stretch marks, scars, uneven skin and dark circles. In a clinical study, 90% saw improved skin. I’m using it myself on some scars, and it really works!
5) A good moisturizer. Pick your brand. Look at the ingredients! If you have acne prone skin, avoid anything that is oil or petroleum based.
HAIR
1) Neutrogena makes a great once a week anti-residue shampoo (no, this does not mean you only have to wash your hair once a week!) that removes hair product build-up. I usually wash my hair with it on Sunday so that my hair is a clean palette for the week.
2) A good shampoo/conditioner. Again, pick your brand. Don’t be afraid to mix it up either! I personally like Herbal Essence’s Tousle Me Softly shampoo and Coconut Milk conditioner. Here’s my spill on why you shouldn’t buy overly expensive shampoo: HELLO! You’re washing it out of your hair! Save your money for good hair product.
3) Such as Frederic Fekkai’s Glossing Crème. It’s made with olive oil and makes your hair ridiculously soft and sleek.
4) A solid hairbrush. You’d be surprised what the right hairbrush can do for you.
5) If you plan to put your hair up in any kind of ponytail make sure you’re using the right kind of hair bands. Scunci has this pretty amazing line of hair bands that are metal-free and no-pull. They’re made of soft silicone and is really great if you have a sensitive scalp.
6) Dry shampoo. Why? Because if you’re like me, sometimes you overdo it with the Fekkai Crème and have no time to shower again. If you have dark hair make sure the spray says that it’s INVISIBLE or you’re going to end up with white powder all over your gorgeous locks.
7) A cute headband. I always feel like I’m channeling Blair from Gossip Girl when I slip on a headband, and that is not a bad thing!
BEAUTY
This one is tricky because not everyone likes make-up and not everyone looks good in make-up. But here’s a tip for those of you who do wear make-up: Less can be beautiful. I really can not stomach the sight of women who appear to be wearing half a bottle of foundation. You don’t need that much! If your skin is so bad that you feel you need to cake on foundation, then you actually don’t need it. Instead you need to focus on letting your skin breathe and heal. Foundation will clog pores. Another tip? Wash your make-up off EVERY night before bed. I know, especially with girls around my age that after a night of going out you really just want to pass out. It only takes a few seconds to wash your face. Plus, no one looks good when they wake up with raccoon eyes.
If you wear make-up:
1) A good foundation/ eyeshadow primer. This creates a barrier between your skin and the gunk you’re putting on it. I admit that I don’t use a foundation primer because I’m a loose powder kind of girl because I can’t abide by a heavy feeling foundation. Pauline suggests Smashbox for your primer and the Lorac brand for both your actual foundation and eyeshadow primer. I’d also like to point out that a lot of common brands are making primers. L’Oreal (whom I love love love) has come out with a line of “Hollywood Secrets” and their primers are pretty awesome.
2) A solid eyeliner. No one looks good with overly smudged eyeliner. Get an eyeliner that defines AND STAYS. Pauline’s pick- Urban Decay. Anda’s pick- I’m a huge fan of Cover Girl’s new Eyelight collection.
3) Fabulous mascara. Don’t buy the cheap stuff, trust me. The cheap stuff damages your eyelashes. I’m having a love affair with L’Oreal’s Collagen Boost mascara. Try it. Love it.
4) Cotton swabs/ baby wipes. Cotton swaps fix little make-up mishaps. Baby wipes take away make-up. It doesn’t get any easier than that.
IF YOU DON’T WEAR MAKE-UP
A good lip balm. If you want to go for something with a splash of color, try Nivea’s line of lip balm.
Also, just a little side note… WEAR PERFUME! Seriously. Even a light body spray goes a long way.
And wear deodorant. I mean it.
So, I know you want to ask us questions. I know you do! Send us questions, comments, random life rants! We want to hear from you! Prtali@yahoo.com
Remember, “I’m beautiful, I’m beautiful, I’M BEAUTIFUL DAMN IT.”
Xoxox
Anda
If you’re anything like me, you have a problem with impulse buying. I know I do, especially when it comes to new skin/hair/nail/makeup products. My bathroom cabinets (and a few storage bins in my room) are full of products I bought on impulse, used a couple times, deemed them crap, and put in a box for “later inspection”. Sound familiar? I’ve compiled a list of things that I firmly believe you must-have (and Pauline made one, too!) I’m not saying that you should never buy any other items because there is always room to try new things, but these should always be in your cabinet and should always be your backup plan when the new items turn out to be complete garbage.
Anda’s List of Must-Haves
Skin Care
1) Anything from Neutrogena. Seriously. I’m a huge fan of their “rapid action” products. I’ve used all sorts of products and none of them ever worked for me until I started using Neutrogena. (on a side note, if your face is naturally oily… you don’t need a moisturizer!)
2) Everyone needs, AT A MINIMUM, two different kinds of lotion. One that locks in moisture after a shower and at night before you go to bed, and one that smells nice for during the day use. Since I’m a tattoo freak, I’m a huge fan Aveeno. It’s fragrance free, so it is especially good if you have sensitive skin. For the other lotion, try something from Bath and Body Works (I really love their summer collection of coconut based lotions). Don’t want to spend a lot? Suave has just come out with a line of lotions comparable to the Bath and Body Works line.
3) Bikini Zone shave gel. Use it EVERYWHERE you shave. Underarms, legs, wherever, wherever. Soaps dry out your skin when you’re shaving. Bikini Zone contains no soap and it aloe based. Result? Smoother, less irritated legs.
4) Bio Oil. It works on stretch marks, scars, uneven skin and dark circles. In a clinical study, 90% saw improved skin. I’m using it myself on some scars, and it really works!
5) A good moisturizer. Pick your brand. Look at the ingredients! If you have acne prone skin, avoid anything that is oil or petroleum based.
HAIR
1) Neutrogena makes a great once a week anti-residue shampoo (no, this does not mean you only have to wash your hair once a week!) that removes hair product build-up. I usually wash my hair with it on Sunday so that my hair is a clean palette for the week.
2) A good shampoo/conditioner. Again, pick your brand. Don’t be afraid to mix it up either! I personally like Herbal Essence’s Tousle Me Softly shampoo and Coconut Milk conditioner. Here’s my spill on why you shouldn’t buy overly expensive shampoo: HELLO! You’re washing it out of your hair! Save your money for good hair product.
3) Such as Frederic Fekkai’s Glossing Crème. It’s made with olive oil and makes your hair ridiculously soft and sleek.
4) A solid hairbrush. You’d be surprised what the right hairbrush can do for you.
5) If you plan to put your hair up in any kind of ponytail make sure you’re using the right kind of hair bands. Scunci has this pretty amazing line of hair bands that are metal-free and no-pull. They’re made of soft silicone and is really great if you have a sensitive scalp.
6) Dry shampoo. Why? Because if you’re like me, sometimes you overdo it with the Fekkai Crème and have no time to shower again. If you have dark hair make sure the spray says that it’s INVISIBLE or you’re going to end up with white powder all over your gorgeous locks.
7) A cute headband. I always feel like I’m channeling Blair from Gossip Girl when I slip on a headband, and that is not a bad thing!
BEAUTY
This one is tricky because not everyone likes make-up and not everyone looks good in make-up. But here’s a tip for those of you who do wear make-up: Less can be beautiful. I really can not stomach the sight of women who appear to be wearing half a bottle of foundation. You don’t need that much! If your skin is so bad that you feel you need to cake on foundation, then you actually don’t need it. Instead you need to focus on letting your skin breathe and heal. Foundation will clog pores. Another tip? Wash your make-up off EVERY night before bed. I know, especially with girls around my age that after a night of going out you really just want to pass out. It only takes a few seconds to wash your face. Plus, no one looks good when they wake up with raccoon eyes.
If you wear make-up:
1) A good foundation/ eyeshadow primer. This creates a barrier between your skin and the gunk you’re putting on it. I admit that I don’t use a foundation primer because I’m a loose powder kind of girl because I can’t abide by a heavy feeling foundation. Pauline suggests Smashbox for your primer and the Lorac brand for both your actual foundation and eyeshadow primer. I’d also like to point out that a lot of common brands are making primers. L’Oreal (whom I love love love) has come out with a line of “Hollywood Secrets” and their primers are pretty awesome.
2) A solid eyeliner. No one looks good with overly smudged eyeliner. Get an eyeliner that defines AND STAYS. Pauline’s pick- Urban Decay. Anda’s pick- I’m a huge fan of Cover Girl’s new Eyelight collection.
3) Fabulous mascara. Don’t buy the cheap stuff, trust me. The cheap stuff damages your eyelashes. I’m having a love affair with L’Oreal’s Collagen Boost mascara. Try it. Love it.
4) Cotton swabs/ baby wipes. Cotton swaps fix little make-up mishaps. Baby wipes take away make-up. It doesn’t get any easier than that.
IF YOU DON’T WEAR MAKE-UP
A good lip balm. If you want to go for something with a splash of color, try Nivea’s line of lip balm.
Also, just a little side note… WEAR PERFUME! Seriously. Even a light body spray goes a long way.
And wear deodorant. I mean it.
So, I know you want to ask us questions. I know you do! Send us questions, comments, random life rants! We want to hear from you! Prtali@yahoo.com
Remember, “I’m beautiful, I’m beautiful, I’M BEAUTIFUL DAMN IT.”
Xoxox
Anda
Thursday, September 30, 2010
Your Boyfriend Is An Accesory
This blog is going to deal with your greatest, and sometimes most troublesome, accessory. Your boyfriend.
I hope all of you out there are either happily single or have found a man that makes you happy and treats you like the fabulous big girl you are.
You know what makes me mad? When I see a beautiful, stylish, fabulous girl with a guy who looks like he A) has been playing in the mud, B) is pretty sure Zest is something you use to spice up the chicken, or C) feels that he’s with a big girl so he doesn’t have to try to look good because she’ll stay with no matter what. (Sadly, C is pretty much a reality when dealing with a girl who has no self-esteem.) Think of your boyfriend as a staple in your wardrobe of life- he should compliment your changes and personality and should look good while doing it.
The problem? Some guys are resistant to change and some of you ladies are lazy. I know it takes a lot to mold a guy, trust me I do. But that’s where it gets fun. Think of your man as a vintage bag. Someone else has owned him at one point, they might have even messed him up, and now it’s your turn to wipe the dirt away and buff out all the scuff marks.
I like to think of my boyfriend as a pair of Christian Louboutin’s that another girl left out in the rain. When we first met, I knew he’d be a lot of work. He was tall and lean, had great hair and teeth, and knew that he could melt a girl with his smile. Problem? His clothes. His last girlfriend had been some freak show who thought that boys only looked good in those god-awful Tripp pants and black t-shirts. I like to think that he was young and impressionable (she was older than him) rather than he actually liked those stupid pants. Honest to God, the pants almost ruined everything. Silly, but true. I did give him a chance and it turned out to be one of the best things I ever did.
But those pants had to go.
I didn’t charge in and throw out his whole wardrobe, and you shouldn’t try to do it either. Men hate change, it’s a fact. Do as I did and gradually introduce new things to him. The first thing I bought him was a few pairs of jeans, regular fit and skinny. Then we started going shopping together. At first, he hated going anywhere that wasn’t Hot Topic, but I finally got him to go into a few different stores. It took me a week to convince him to wear a V-neck, but when he finally did, he realized how ridiculous a V-neck looks with those horrible Tripp pants and he started wearing the skinny jeans. Once you get your guy out of his comfort zone, BACK OFF. Too much, too soon will propel him back into his ugly habits. After a few months, he realized how much he loved the skinny jeans and the V-necks and slim fit tees. Once he was comfortable with that, I added to his wardrobe. A cute vest, some nice button downs, etc.
Now, why did I go to all this trouble? Because he is my vintage bag, my Louboutin’s, my arm candy.
I'm not saying that you can't love your man and all his flaws because you can. But wouldn't you tell your best friend if she was looking a hot mess? Yeah, I thought so. It's the same principle.
Your boyfriend is your accessory, ladies. Do not let him go into public smelling or looking a hot mess. Because no one wants to see your honey at his worst.
Remember, “I’m beautiful, I’m beautiful, I’M BEAUTIFUL, DAMN IT!”
Xoxox
Anda
I hope all of you out there are either happily single or have found a man that makes you happy and treats you like the fabulous big girl you are.
You know what makes me mad? When I see a beautiful, stylish, fabulous girl with a guy who looks like he A) has been playing in the mud, B) is pretty sure Zest is something you use to spice up the chicken, or C) feels that he’s with a big girl so he doesn’t have to try to look good because she’ll stay with no matter what. (Sadly, C is pretty much a reality when dealing with a girl who has no self-esteem.) Think of your boyfriend as a staple in your wardrobe of life- he should compliment your changes and personality and should look good while doing it.
The problem? Some guys are resistant to change and some of you ladies are lazy. I know it takes a lot to mold a guy, trust me I do. But that’s where it gets fun. Think of your man as a vintage bag. Someone else has owned him at one point, they might have even messed him up, and now it’s your turn to wipe the dirt away and buff out all the scuff marks.
I like to think of my boyfriend as a pair of Christian Louboutin’s that another girl left out in the rain. When we first met, I knew he’d be a lot of work. He was tall and lean, had great hair and teeth, and knew that he could melt a girl with his smile. Problem? His clothes. His last girlfriend had been some freak show who thought that boys only looked good in those god-awful Tripp pants and black t-shirts. I like to think that he was young and impressionable (she was older than him) rather than he actually liked those stupid pants. Honest to God, the pants almost ruined everything. Silly, but true. I did give him a chance and it turned out to be one of the best things I ever did.
But those pants had to go.
I didn’t charge in and throw out his whole wardrobe, and you shouldn’t try to do it either. Men hate change, it’s a fact. Do as I did and gradually introduce new things to him. The first thing I bought him was a few pairs of jeans, regular fit and skinny. Then we started going shopping together. At first, he hated going anywhere that wasn’t Hot Topic, but I finally got him to go into a few different stores. It took me a week to convince him to wear a V-neck, but when he finally did, he realized how ridiculous a V-neck looks with those horrible Tripp pants and he started wearing the skinny jeans. Once you get your guy out of his comfort zone, BACK OFF. Too much, too soon will propel him back into his ugly habits. After a few months, he realized how much he loved the skinny jeans and the V-necks and slim fit tees. Once he was comfortable with that, I added to his wardrobe. A cute vest, some nice button downs, etc.
Now, why did I go to all this trouble? Because he is my vintage bag, my Louboutin’s, my arm candy.
I'm not saying that you can't love your man and all his flaws because you can. But wouldn't you tell your best friend if she was looking a hot mess? Yeah, I thought so. It's the same principle.
Your boyfriend is your accessory, ladies. Do not let him go into public smelling or looking a hot mess. Because no one wants to see your honey at his worst.
Remember, “I’m beautiful, I’m beautiful, I’M BEAUTIFUL, DAMN IT!”
Xoxox
Anda
Tuesday, September 21, 2010
Acceptance
Being big in a thin-centric world is hard. It's not impossible though.
I am nearly 100% positive that all of us have been at the butt end of jokes and other ridicule due to our weight. Especially in grade school. But now that we are grown up, how do we deal with it?
How do we deal with an unruly classmate in college or a jerk at the office?
It isn't the easiest thing to deal with, but it is a fact that Big Girls (and guys too) get teased. And I am going to try and give you some ideas about how to deal with it. And how to do it without throwing a punch or going to jail.
All kinds of people pick on us. And they can be broken down into three different categories. The skinny bitch, the average joe, and the ugly.
First the reason why the skinny bitch takes swipes at us. They can be male or female. But they are pretty much all the same. The reason they say ugly things about our weight is that they are mad at us. They hate us because we can look good at our size. And it especially pisses them off when we have a man hanging off of us and they don't.
Second is the average joe. They can also be male or female. I usually have found that this is a small percentage compared to the other two categories. But these people tease because of their own attitude. They might have had a bad day or week or they are going through something that has them down and they want to drag you down with them so that they don't feel that they are alone on the bottom. Basically they want a "pick me up", and to them we are the perfect target.
Last is the ugly. Now don't give me grief for saying what I am about to say, because I know we have all been through it. But physically ugly people love to tease us Big Girls. And when I say ugly, I mean when they fell out of the ugly tree, every single branch hit them on the way down. And they tease us about our weight because people teased them about their physical attributes, or lack there of. It is a vicious cycle.
And as for being ugly, all three types of these people are ugly. If not on the outside then on the inside. And if it at all makes you feel any better about it, we may be fat, but they will always be ugly. Not even the greatest plastic surgeon can fix what's on the inside. Ever.
To deal with these people, depending on where you were, I would either 1. just walk away. Defuse the situation by leaving. If you do this, it takes away the power of what they said to you. This works well if you are in a situation where you do not have to deal with the person(s) on a daily basis or very much at all.
Or 2. Confront them. Get on your big fat soap box and tell em that yes, I am a Big Girl, and yes I am just as attractive as skinny Sally in accounting, or the girl in the cowboy hat standing at the bar. Beauty is as beauty does. So I'm not your cup of tea with heavy cream? Don't look, dickhead.
When people start in on you, they do it because of their own self image and self esteem issues. Don't let their words drag you through the mud. You are not a mat and you are not to be walked all over. You are worth far too much for that.
And I know that just because you are confident, it doesn't mean that the words don't hurt.
I would journal about it, or talk to your friends about it. Get a therapist if you need to. The whole "suffer in silence" thing isn't worth the emotional damage that you may suffer from in the end.
Talk about it with people and it will take a huge weight off your shoulders.
And always remember: Hold your head up. Be confident, plus confidence is a very sexy thing. You are beautiful. Live your life on your terms, and don't let all of the jerks in this world mess with your head.
Don't be afraid, Big Girls!
You run this world.
Xoxo- Pauline
I am nearly 100% positive that all of us have been at the butt end of jokes and other ridicule due to our weight. Especially in grade school. But now that we are grown up, how do we deal with it?
How do we deal with an unruly classmate in college or a jerk at the office?
It isn't the easiest thing to deal with, but it is a fact that Big Girls (and guys too) get teased. And I am going to try and give you some ideas about how to deal with it. And how to do it without throwing a punch or going to jail.
All kinds of people pick on us. And they can be broken down into three different categories. The skinny bitch, the average joe, and the ugly.
First the reason why the skinny bitch takes swipes at us. They can be male or female. But they are pretty much all the same. The reason they say ugly things about our weight is that they are mad at us. They hate us because we can look good at our size. And it especially pisses them off when we have a man hanging off of us and they don't.
Second is the average joe. They can also be male or female. I usually have found that this is a small percentage compared to the other two categories. But these people tease because of their own attitude. They might have had a bad day or week or they are going through something that has them down and they want to drag you down with them so that they don't feel that they are alone on the bottom. Basically they want a "pick me up", and to them we are the perfect target.
Last is the ugly. Now don't give me grief for saying what I am about to say, because I know we have all been through it. But physically ugly people love to tease us Big Girls. And when I say ugly, I mean when they fell out of the ugly tree, every single branch hit them on the way down. And they tease us about our weight because people teased them about their physical attributes, or lack there of. It is a vicious cycle.
And as for being ugly, all three types of these people are ugly. If not on the outside then on the inside. And if it at all makes you feel any better about it, we may be fat, but they will always be ugly. Not even the greatest plastic surgeon can fix what's on the inside. Ever.
To deal with these people, depending on where you were, I would either 1. just walk away. Defuse the situation by leaving. If you do this, it takes away the power of what they said to you. This works well if you are in a situation where you do not have to deal with the person(s) on a daily basis or very much at all.
Or 2. Confront them. Get on your big fat soap box and tell em that yes, I am a Big Girl, and yes I am just as attractive as skinny Sally in accounting, or the girl in the cowboy hat standing at the bar. Beauty is as beauty does. So I'm not your cup of tea with heavy cream? Don't look, dickhead.
When people start in on you, they do it because of their own self image and self esteem issues. Don't let their words drag you through the mud. You are not a mat and you are not to be walked all over. You are worth far too much for that.
And I know that just because you are confident, it doesn't mean that the words don't hurt.
I would journal about it, or talk to your friends about it. Get a therapist if you need to. The whole "suffer in silence" thing isn't worth the emotional damage that you may suffer from in the end.
Talk about it with people and it will take a huge weight off your shoulders.
And always remember: Hold your head up. Be confident, plus confidence is a very sexy thing. You are beautiful. Live your life on your terms, and don't let all of the jerks in this world mess with your head.
Don't be afraid, Big Girls!
You run this world.
Xoxo- Pauline
Friday, September 10, 2010
When Skinny Jeans Attack!
While I was walking to class the other, I saw a girl who looked like her jeans were attacking here. Seriously. They appeared to be cutting into her thighs and hips, and I think they may have been trying to strangle her calves.
Here’s the deal, ladies. There is a difference between “skinny jeans” and “strangle jeans”. When you’re a big girl, skinny jeans are something you MUST approach carefully. Not all big girls can rock the fitted jeans, and if you can’t, then don’t wear them.
Signs that your skinny jeans are too skinny:
1) If they give you a muffin top.
2) If you lose any type of feeling and/or circulation.
3) If you can’t bend your knees.
4) If the material makes any of your jiggle bulge.
Seriously, though, I can’t imagine wearing anything that would make me uncomfortable. Fashion doesn’t have to be painful (we leave that to the skinny bitches).
Also, I feel compelled to add that they make jeans to fit every sort of girl out there. (Pauline did a blog on body types. If you missed it, go read it.) Lane Bryant and Avenue both sell an array of jeans that fit your body type and are reasonably affordable. Several times a year both stores have sales on jeans. Why am I saying this? Because I can not STAND the sight of big girls in cloth shorts and sweat pants. Honestly, I can’t stand the sight of ANY woman in sweat pants in public. I especially hate when bigger girls try to copy that ugly fad skinny bitches seem to love (wearing ironically large sweat pants when they are a size 0). That doesn’t work for us, girls. It just makes us look larger. ESPECIALLY when you wear the sweat pants that have the elastic at the bottom that hugs your ankle. If you must wear sweat pants (and I really wish you wouldn’t), then choose the type that is open ended at the bottom. (the Starter brand offers a line of these).
I admit, I occasionally wear sweat pants. At home. Where no one can see me except for my dogs. Never in public, though.
Another thing you should never wear in public? Cloth shorts. Cloth shorts are made for sleepy time and nothing else. They make me ill for two reasons. 1) They never stay in place. At some point that are going to ride up and you are either going to have to pull them down (ick) or just walk around with what I like to call an “all around wedgie (use your imagination). 2) A person who wears cloth shorts are usually wearing a t-shirt, probably a dirty t-shirt, and therefore they do not looked pulled together.
That’s the whole point of this blog, right? To look better, too feel better, and too deal with life’s big girl haters. You don’t feel good? Don’t feel like dressing up? You’d be surprised how good a messy (think surfer chic) ponytail, fitted jeans, and a nice t-shirt or hoodie looks. And that is low maintenance.
So, here’s the spill: Wear jeans, not sweat pants/cloth shorts. Don’t wear strangle jeans.
And as always, remember: “I’m beautiful, I’m beautiful, I’M BEAUTIFUL, DAMN IT!”
Xoxox
Anda
Here’s the deal, ladies. There is a difference between “skinny jeans” and “strangle jeans”. When you’re a big girl, skinny jeans are something you MUST approach carefully. Not all big girls can rock the fitted jeans, and if you can’t, then don’t wear them.
Signs that your skinny jeans are too skinny:
1) If they give you a muffin top.
2) If you lose any type of feeling and/or circulation.
3) If you can’t bend your knees.
4) If the material makes any of your jiggle bulge.
Seriously, though, I can’t imagine wearing anything that would make me uncomfortable. Fashion doesn’t have to be painful (we leave that to the skinny bitches).
Also, I feel compelled to add that they make jeans to fit every sort of girl out there. (Pauline did a blog on body types. If you missed it, go read it.) Lane Bryant and Avenue both sell an array of jeans that fit your body type and are reasonably affordable. Several times a year both stores have sales on jeans. Why am I saying this? Because I can not STAND the sight of big girls in cloth shorts and sweat pants. Honestly, I can’t stand the sight of ANY woman in sweat pants in public. I especially hate when bigger girls try to copy that ugly fad skinny bitches seem to love (wearing ironically large sweat pants when they are a size 0). That doesn’t work for us, girls. It just makes us look larger. ESPECIALLY when you wear the sweat pants that have the elastic at the bottom that hugs your ankle. If you must wear sweat pants (and I really wish you wouldn’t), then choose the type that is open ended at the bottom. (the Starter brand offers a line of these).
I admit, I occasionally wear sweat pants. At home. Where no one can see me except for my dogs. Never in public, though.
Another thing you should never wear in public? Cloth shorts. Cloth shorts are made for sleepy time and nothing else. They make me ill for two reasons. 1) They never stay in place. At some point that are going to ride up and you are either going to have to pull them down (ick) or just walk around with what I like to call an “all around wedgie (use your imagination). 2) A person who wears cloth shorts are usually wearing a t-shirt, probably a dirty t-shirt, and therefore they do not looked pulled together.
That’s the whole point of this blog, right? To look better, too feel better, and too deal with life’s big girl haters. You don’t feel good? Don’t feel like dressing up? You’d be surprised how good a messy (think surfer chic) ponytail, fitted jeans, and a nice t-shirt or hoodie looks. And that is low maintenance.
So, here’s the spill: Wear jeans, not sweat pants/cloth shorts. Don’t wear strangle jeans.
And as always, remember: “I’m beautiful, I’m beautiful, I’M BEAUTIFUL, DAMN IT!”
Xoxox
Anda
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